Wake up

Everyone wants to talk about a so called system that's designed to keep the black race down when in all actuality it's been redesigned and formatted to make the black race the superior again. Think about it. Wake up and analyze everything that's right in your faces. Pick up a book, listen to speeches, and ask questions. The world is now designed for black people to rule. It's now designed for black people to be on top. Just look at all the rights and amendments in the constitution that are there because of us. If you have a problem with the constitution, then turn on ESPN,BET,VHI,MTV,Lifetime,and OWN (Oprah Winfrey Network) and tell me what you see. Black people with money. "Icons" of the black community. A lot of them just don't care enough about their people though so a lot of them won't build schools,stores,or libraries in the 'hood. We praise those same "icons" for their accomplishments but what do they do for you? Do they put you through school? Have they given you a job? Everybody thought when Obama was elected as the first black president things were going to get better but that was a blessing from God and where there's God there's the devil standing right next to him throwing rocks and stones in the river God made to flow freely. Obama getting elected was the first step. He became the silent voice but loud statement we needed as people to push through it all but instead people saw him in office and thought they were also in office and could do anything without consequences. That should've been the moment black people should've seen our greatness unfold. Think about this, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Said during an interview that the United States of America would have a black president in 40 years. It took 44 years. Do you see that? Do you see the greatness instilled in our people? There's no reason for us to sit around and wait for things that happen to us to change because we have to change it ourselves. Can you change? Would you rebuild our communities and teach our children right? 

Do Black Lives Really Matter?

How much do we matter in this world? Are we here looking for sympathy? Do we feel we are owed? The answer to two of these questions is yes. We go around as a race looking for handouts, still waiting on our 40 acres and a mule but news flash, we not getting it. We can't continue to sit around and think the world owes us everything because it doesn't. We have to depend on each other to get our superiority back. We have to depend on each other to learn and to succeed in life. For those of you who get mad at people that say "All Lives Matter" are hypocrites. The only time you scream black lives matter is when a white person kills a black person. That sounds kind of wishy washy to me. You want to stake our claim in the world, well let's first start by educating our children on life. Educate them on the history of our people and where we come from. Tell them about all the good our black ancestors did and not just about what white people did. Let's tell them about how a black man designed the nation and how a black man invented the blood transfusion method. Let's teach them that part. As a black man, it's my duty and obligation to make sure my people are educated and know their divine rights given to them and instilled in them by God the almighty. Let's recapture our minds. Knowledge is truly power. The more you know and think about and begin to realize things, the more you'll accomplish and the longer you live. We want the world to change, let's start with the man/woman in the mirror. Can you change yourself for the sake of your people? 

Society

The society we live in today is all out of balance. We have blacks killing blacks and thinking it's okay but whites killing blacks and it's racist. We live in a society where the more important issues are about who dating who and who has the number 1 album/record. When the real issue is the Spawn of Satan has a chance to become the leader of the free world. Let's take time to think about that. A known racist has an opportunity to be the president of the United States but we worried about Beyoncé album. As far as the killing goes, that'll never stop but what we need to realize is we have to keep ourselves out of those positions. The most killings are happening in poverty stricken areas where the crime rates are through the roof. Fix us and fix our communities before we expect someone else to. Once we stop treating each other (black people) like animals and show some respect for one another, then we would be able to stake claim to racial injustice. 

How I Love

I'm the kind of guy, when I tell you I love you don't take it lightly because I truly mean it. It's hard for me to let my love out a lot of times. I think that's because of the relationship I had with my father but I won't go too deep in to that on this one. When I allow myself to love, I love hard. I put my all into it and every time I get nothing in return but heartache and then I look stupid. I've only truly loved one girl and she broke me in a way that I can't even begin to explain. I still have a whole bunch of love for her to this day but she won't ever know that. I won't say I have trust issues but I'll say it'll be hard for me to ever truly love again. I have a lot of love to give and I want someone to feel the kind of love I have to offer. With my love, I'll wake you up to breakfast in bed just because, I'll buy you flowers and take you places just because, I'll write you beautiful songs and poems just because. I'll do things the average man won't do because I don't want to be viewed as the average man, I want to be viewed as the greatest man you ever met. If I do find that woman I can give that kind of love to, I'm going to show her off. People will know who she is and how much love I have for her but they'll never know what we going through. That woman will love God just as much as me and we can have God in our relationship. With God in our circle how can anything go wrong? 

Lessons Learned

Everyday I wake up, I think of what my life was. I was truly a lost soul. A lost cause. Drinking and smoking almost everyday. I had no idea where I was going or what I was supposed to be doing but eventually I got it. God woke me up one day and told me to get my act together. This is not what he had planned for me. I listened. It kind of scared me to know that God really did exist and that he really cared enough to make me change so I could spend my life with Him. I was embarrassed it took me so long to figure it out or to get to know who he is but I'm not perfect I've made mistakes and I've learned from them. God is my father. He is my rock,soul, and every breath. Without Him I would be nothing. I thank Him everyday for allowing me to continue to grow and continue to gain access to His kingdom. Stay blessed. Seek God and pray. With Him in your corner anything is possible. 

My Father

If you know me, you know I didn't grow up with my dad. I knew who he was and spent time with him a few times but other than that I didn't have him. For the longest time it killed me inside, I thought it was my fault and that I wasn't good enough and he wanted nothing to do with me. It still kills me today but I can accept it more. I use to cry a lot thinking about it. I cried about it for the first time this year. It sucks. Not having my dad around, I went through life with a big fear of rejection and abandonment. Around my 16th birthday is when I stopped looking for him to come around. He would tell me he was going to take me fishing, buy me clothes and toys, and take me to Reds games. It never happened. From my 13th birthday to my 15th birthday the birthday calls would come a day later than the actual day. Turned 16 and didn't even get a call at all. I hated him. I use to speak ill will on him and everything and this is bad for me to say but I've always thought about how I would feel if he was gone gone. I can't answer that because I don't know. How can you feel for someone you barely know? Obviously I'm not wanting him to die but I've thought about how I would feel if he did. If you have your father in your life, cherish him because there's people like me who don't have their fathers in their lives. I wish him all the best of luck and may he stay blessed. 

Love

Sometimes I wonder if I'm meant to find love. Like that real genuine love that people write books about it. It's that one kind of love that when you wake up and go to sleep you feel warm inside. That one kind of love that people say they want. My brothers have the relationships I want. I have a whole bunch of love to give and happiness to share. I just wish I could find someone to give it. It's kind of depressing that love seems to skip right over me. It's now to the point where I lay up late at night and wonder if I'll die alone or if I'll ever be good enough if that woman comes along. I know I'm supposed to be patient but it's hard to stay patient when every time you look up someone's in love around you. I just want to be loved and make someone feel special. I want love. Why is so hard for me to find love?